Success

Dunes by April S. Fields

Latex on wood - 5'X3'

Success is going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.

- Winston Churchill

There is a point, somewhere just after I begin a creative endeavor where I ask myself whatever gave me the idea I could accomplish such a thing. Doesn't matter what it is, writing, painting, sewing, or puppet show production. Nor does it matter how many times I have done something similar, I begin anew each time. And each time I wonder if this will be the attempt that does me in, believing this is not "if" but "when". I used to think I was grossly deficient in the self-confidence department, now I have come to recognize this head game as an intrigal part of my creative process. Seems, and I'm only guessing here, I allow the ever cynical left side of my brain to taunt and tease the tender, more vulnerable right side as a check and balance system. Simply put, it keeps me humble. It also insures I never reach a place where I consider myself to be at a pinnacle of achievement. It would be the greatest embarrassment of my life to think I had finally done something to crow about only to discover I was really something less than mediocre all along. I've seen others fall into this pit and I'm sure I don't want to go there. If I am mediocre, I want to know it from the outset. I can handle mediocre if I know in my heart I gave it my best shot and still came up wanting. After all, this is entirely different from being mediocre for laziness or quitting in midstream, defeated by the difficulty of the enterprise.

So, with no illusions about my potential or raw skills, fully aware I am awash with both, what I am is nothing more than a work in progress, never fully complete. This is, in many ways, better than having arrived anyway. So long as I am honest with myself where I am in the journey I can maintain the enthusiasm necessary to carry forward even when understanding there isn't a defined destination. Though, in some areas, I have at last hit a wall and I accept that future improvements will be minimal at best. With this I have made my peace. But so long as I remain open to suggestions and ever mindful that improvements, however small are possible, I keep moving. The trick is to recognize and seize on opportunities to expand and to be always at the ready to dive in fearlessly.

Disregarding all axioms on how to be successful, I engage in first gear fully expecting to fail. But hear me out because I have stumbled across a secret revealing what defines true success, which is nothing more than the simple act of trying and then trying again. Success is a process. There is a famous quote attributed to Robert Fulghum, "If at first you don’t succeed, redefine success". So I submit a new axiom - I try, therefore I succeed.

Once you grasp the simplicity of this concept, you understand that regardless of how society interprets success, those of us who persevere inspite of never finding fame or fortune, are those who live successfully. Not because we reach a specified goal, but because, neither obscurity nor lack of riches can limit someone who is sincerely committed to continued personal growth.

If persistence promotes continued growth and success is defined by persistence,then I'm proud to say I'm right on track.